Ultimate Cheerleaders

The Sparkle Bra: A Cautionary Tale

Before we get too far into audition season, and everyone has spent beaucoup bucks on their audition outfits, I need to make a Public Service Announcement: Beware of The Sparkle Bra.

You’ve seen it. You’ve probably seen it a lot. You might even own one. You like it because it is beaded and sequined and cute. You like it because is widely available and (relatively) inexpensive. But guess what? Those are the same reasons why everyone else likes it too. There is someone wearing this top at EVERY pro audition, so you might want to think twice about wearing it.

Proof. Exhibits A, B, and C:

Sometimes there are several someones wearing it. So before you purchase/borrow a Sparkle Bra, remember that you are taking a risk. You may luck out. It may be one of those auditions where only one person wears it, and that person is you. But it is far more likely that other members of Team Sparkle Bra will be in attendance that day. Especially if it’s one of those NFL auditions that draw dancers by the hundred.

This is what I call rotten luck. Three Sparkle Bras, darn near back to back (204, 206, and 207.) What you don’t see in this photo is the other THREE girls who were also rocking The Sparkle Bra that day.

But what if you’ve already purchased The Sparkle Bra? What if you can’t return it? There’s always the option to accessorize and make it your own. Add some trim, layer it under another top, do what you need to.

Sometimes that works, and sometimes it doesn’t. Apologies to Miss 363. You are adorable, but that white top shows every lump and bump.

The other option is to make your Sparkle Bra part of an overall ensemble that has so much other stuff going on, the bra is almost an afterthought. Like so:

Now you’re all bummed out about your Sparkle Bra. You’re thinking “Forget it.” You’re thinking “Hey! I’ll get this one instead. It’s just as sparkly and just as cute.”

No, honey. Don’t buy that one either. For obvious reasons.

Choose wisely, y’all.
And that’s all I have to say about that.

About the Author

Sasha

Tags: Auditions

3 thoughts on "The Sparkle Bra: A Cautionary Tale"

  1. Kia Patrece says:

    This is hilarious, informative, and most of all TRUE!! One of the biggest reasons I decided to create my own audition top this year. It will be inexpensive and original. I will be at the San Diego Charger Girls auditions with it so hopefully someone will get a good photo 🙂

  2. Lissa S says:

    Yikes! It makes it tough to stand out when you’re dressed like everyone else! I used The Line Up for the four seasons I auditioned for an NFL Cheer team, and was able to wear a unique, flattering stand out audition costume each year. Cheers!

  3. Daisy Mastroianni says:

    At the end of the day…it shouldn’t matter what you have on, you should be able to stand out with your talent. Once you make the team you are wearing the SAME UNIFORM….so what sets you apart from the girl to your left or right is how you kill it on the field or court! Good Luck to everyone this season at auditions!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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